Each Time You Say "Yes" When You Mean "No," You Lose A Little Piece Of Yourself
The Power Of "No"
Expectations, obligations, and pressure can lead us to commit ingeniously to things and people.
If we continue to do things we don’t want to long enough, eventually, we turn into bitter zombies who lose their identity because we’ve said “yes” too frequently to the wrong things.
Here’s where we frequently don’t say “no” enough:
Work/Career
Relationships
People have been disappointed in me when I don’t show up for them how they expect me to, but they never realize their expectations misalign with my own.
Appearing “nice” is overrated.
Appearing “rude,” “insensitive,” or “selfish” is underrated.
We must all tune in to ourselves more and acknowledge our feelings to stay in the driver’s seat.
And I’ve learned similar lessons in my relationships—everyone has to do what’s best for them.
Ultimately, we do not and will not always understand the motives behind people’s “no” and the limitations they set with us.
And this is okay.
It’s better for others to say “no” and be happy than to say “yes” and be miserable; our relationships will eventually explode if we continue unhealthy patterns (i.e., saying “yes” when we mean and feel “no”) long enough.
Stay flexible with people as you wish them to stay flexible with you; this creates healthier relationships and a healthier you.
Accepting others’ boundaries indicates you are a healthy person.
How many of you felt “no” throughout your entire body, but your mouth said “yes?”
Eventually, if you start forcing yourself to blurt out “no” enough, it becomes more comfortable, and you no longer fear the other person’s reaction.
Because that’s ultimately where our fear of saying “no” stems: we fear rejection or others’ negative emotional reactions, but we can’t control how people respond to us.
We can only manage ourselves.
For those who never say “no” to the wrong things…
You might wake up one day not knowing who you’ve become and find yourself stuck with an identity crisis.
or
Your current destination is an unanticipated nightmare because you couldn’t say “no” when and where it mattered most.
Just say “no.”
Whatever and whoever it is will be okay.
It’s always you who has to live with your choices 24/7.
Each time you say “yes” when you mean “no,” you lose a little piece of yourself.