I’m Worth it, Damn It!

It’s like we have been brainwashed into believing that we do not deserve to have or experience something or someone that fills us with joy…

It’s like we have been brainwashed into believing that we do not deserve to have or experience something or someone that fills us with joy and matches our worth. So many of us believe that we deserve to only be paid the bare minimum, but simultaneously work our asses off. So many of us stay with “good” people that don’t even make us happy, but we stay because we feel that being with a “good” person is good enough.

Why do some of us only ask for salaries that are below what we truly desire? Because we feel that we don’t deserve more; we feel that asking for salaries that seem “high” or out of reach are not worthy of us.

Why do some people only apply for jobs that they are overqualified for or feel they are good enough for? Because people are scared to step out of their comfort zone, and people believe they could never land a job that seems beyond their qualifications.

Why do some people stay in jobs for the long haul with horrible bosses and co-workers? Because they feel they do not deserve something better.

Why do some people feel they are worthless if they do not have the best education or any at all? Because they have let society determine their worth based on a piece of paper that really means nothing.

Why do some people stay in abusive (physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual) relationships? Because they feel that they don’t deserve better; they don’t believe someone else could love them any better, which is true because they don’t even love themselves enough to leave that situation.

Why do some people avoid negotiating their benefits and things they would like to experience on their jobs? Because they believe they won’t get it, and they also believe it will annoy their bosses. Most importantly, they don’t believe they deserve it.

Why do many people settle for sub-par in all areas of their lives? Because many people believe that is all they deserve. Many people don’t believe they can experience any better.

Why do people maintain basic relationships with basic people they don’t even want to invest in further? Because many people believe that those relationships are the only ones they can have. Many people are scared to make new friends, have trust issues, and don’t believe anyone could accept who they really are because they don’t even accept themselves.

I believe that upbringing and family roots can have an effect on a person’s self-worth. Some people teach their children to value not only themselves, but to also value their own desires and opinions. Other people come up in families that teach mentalities that stress: be happy with what you got, accept what you get, don’t get greedy, if you ask for too much it could hurt your reputation or you may lose everything altogether, and work hard and accept your lot in life. I’m not sure why families teach this latter mentality, besides the fact that most likely that is what they were taught in the past.

Something I have learned though is to never undermine and sell myself short. It can be very uncomfortable to ask for what you want (especially when you are not used to doing this), but once you get into the practice of it, it becomes a lot easier and eventually becomes second nature.

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