Most People Are Scared To Restructure Their Social Circles
Do your friendships and relationships suck? Be real.
Starting new relationships of any kind (friendship, professional, or romantic) can be a scary thing.
I’m scared to meet new people.
It’s hard to put myself out there.
No one will understand me like my current circle of friends.
The people in my life might be toxic, but at least I have people.
My partner and I aren’t a healthy match, but we got history, and they understand me.
You have to put yourself out there and start over.
The whole process of building trust and getting to know the other person can feel like a drag.
But if we think back to the times we were in the initial stages with our partners, friends, and associates, it wasn’t that hard after all. Was it?
Survey most people’s relationships, and they’re sub-par at best. Many relationships are toxic, unhealthy, or not adding value in a productive capacity.
Why do people stay engaged with unhealthy friendships, marriages, and colleagues?
Well, it’s easy and easier not to establish new relationships with healthier individuals; this would require effort, energy, courage, and detachment from the old.
I speak from experience because I used to try and hold on to everyone from my past and present even though they had no productive utilization or purpose in my life.
My mindset was based on scarcity (more on this a few lines down).
Once I broke the barrier and put myself out there, I haven’t been able to look back or maintain active relationships with those who don’t fit into my intentions.
I’ve also noticed that new people consistently flock into my life because I’m more open and constantly putting myself out there.
Not only that, but I’m also helping others open themselves to new relationships, which is even more rewarding.
Creating a healthy ecosystem for yourself is rewarding, but creating a healthy ecosystem for others is more fulfilling and a pure act of generosity.
Do You Have A Scarcity Mentality?
If you try to hold on to everyone who comes into your life, you might have a scarcity mentality.
Old Thought Processes:
You need to keep everyone in your life. You never know when you might need each other.
Not investing in every relationship is burning bridges.
If a person does not meet your standards, you should keep them in your life.
Go with the flow and allow everyone to stay in your life.
Even if someone has shown their not-the-best intentions for you, keep them in your life — as long as they’re not “too” detrimental.
New Thought Processes:
You don't need to be prioritized if you don’t align with my values. My time is invaluable and a non-renewable resource.
We don't need to maintain a functional relationship if you have no worthy purpose in my life.
If you’re toxic or negative, I can’t spend too much time around or conversing with you — even if love is shared.
If you’re not doing anything productive with your life, what are you doing in mine?
If we can’t have honest conversations and you can’t handle blunt truths, you can exit.
We don’t need to force anything if there's no genuine connection.
Some people cannot leave relationships because they don’t believe anyone will understand or love them. But the truth is they don’t love themselves enough.
Some people cannot leave behind old friendships because they have trust issues and don’t believe they can establish new meaningful connections with others.
You don’t have to have one best friend or one soulmate.
You’re forgetting that there are 8 billion plus people out in the world who could add value to your life.
How Do You Feel Around Your Current Social Circle?
When you leave the presence of people in your social circle, you should feel whole, joyous, refreshed, and rejuvenated most of the time. You should leave their presence a happier person.
If you feel drained or look forward to exiting someone’s presence, maybe it’s time to start de-prioritizing them and prioritizing those who do the opposite.
Have you ever left someone’s presence smiling and your cup full of energy? That’s the kind of people you want surrounding you. If this isn’t the case for you, it might be time to restructure your social circle.
Life is too short to spend it on people you don’t share meaningful and intentional connections with.
That’s all, folks—peace out.
Destiny